I Blame GOD! Why Bring A Man Who Doesn’t Love Me? Why Pain?

Scripture 1: For rarely will anyone die for a righteous man, though for a good man one might possibly dare to die. But GOD shows His love for us in that while we were yet sinners Christ died for us (Romans 5:7-8).

 Scripture 2: Truly God is good to the upright, to those who are pure in heart. But as for me my feet had almost stumbled, my faith was almost gone. For I was jealous of the arrogant; when I saw the prosperity of the wicked. When my thoughts were bitter, and my feelings were hurt, I was as stupid as an animal. I did not understand you. Yet I always stay close to you, and you hold me by the hand. You guide me with your instruction, and in the end, you will receive me in honor (Psalms 73:1-3; 21-28).

Image by Claudia Wolff

There is nothing like two heartbreaks to make you reconsider an entire life of bachelorhood. The first guy was a mistake. I told myself it was because I was not a Christian in my early twenties. As such, I was young and completely confused by all those love songs. I wondered why I ever listened to love songs sung by artists on their third marriage.

But the second relationship happened in A.B (After Baptism). I had already given my life to Christ. I was determined to walk by his ways. I was zealous for the Church, and I was motivated to share his word. This second guy was from the Church. And yes, I know that there are millions of Sunday Christians. But this guy was different (that’s what my brain said). This guy was an answered prayer. But in the end, he was worse than the unbeliever.

I blamed God.

I blamed God for many things that were wrong in my life as a youth (e.g., joblessness, lack of opportunities, a loveless life, two MAJOR heartbreaks, the past, lack of support, friends who abandoned me, e.t.c).

It reached a point that the voices in my head became powerful. You see, I moved beyond the blame God season to the forsake God season. Fortunately, I had the word in my heart as I had spent most of my jobless era studying. The Bible says that the word of God is the sword of the Spirit (Ephesians 6:17). So I said in my heart before I forsake God, let me mourn in God and ask Him to strengthen my heart.

I blamed God no more, for I found peace in Him.

Why Do People Blame God?

I believe we blame God because it is easier to blame God. When we consider His nature, e.g., omniscient, which means all-knowing, omnipotent, which means All-Powerful, and Omnipresent, He is widespread/Everywhere. We can conclude that we are justified in blaming God.

But are we justified in blaming God?

The answer to this question by the end of the day lies with you. You can choose to do the math and decide whether to blame God. You can choose to shame that urge to blame God by praising God. Or, you can prefer to be silent about the whole thing and continue with your life.

To me, the three options have been continuously set before me. There were situations where it was easy to get up and praise God. At the same time, there were situations I felt it would be wise to pretend. Pretend that everything is okay, but secretly in your heart, you blamed God.
Some say we blame God because we don’t want to accept responsibility.

This is true. Some sufferings occur as a result of our mistakes.

In Homer’s Odyssey, the writer states:

“Men are so quick to blame the gods; they say that we devise their misery. But they themselves in their depravity-design grief greater than the griefs that fate assigns.”

Should we or should we not blame God? 

What are we blaming God for? 

Did the People In the Bible Blame GOD? 

There are people in the Bible who were stricken by calamity. One of them was Job. The Bible is clear that Job was a man who was careful to do everything right in God’s eyes. Job had seven sons and three daughters (Job 1:2). He was also the richest man in the Middle East. Yet, overnight! The richest man became the poorest man in the Middle East. Job also went from being a dad to ten kids to having no kids at all.

But the Bible says this: In all this, Job did not sin or charge God with wrong (Job 1:22).

Sometimes I wonder if it’s all the fairytales and happy cartoons that we watched growing up. I wonder if all those shows convinced our psychology that life is that simple. We obey! We do, right! And it all goes well.

But this is not the case.

After Job lost all his wealth and his children, he woke up one day to find his body covered with a dreaded skin condition (Job 2:7). Things went from bad to worse for Job to the point that his wife advised him to curse God and die (Job 2:9).

But Job answered his wife by saying, “Shall we bless God only when He does good for us, and curse Him when He does wrong? “(Job 2:10).

Hmmmmm! So God does wrong? Do bad things happen to good people?

Job’s friends came to Job to console him. For most of the book, the friends talk in much wisdom as they try to explain to Job why he was going through a hard time.

For most of the conversation, Job did not blame God. Instead, he talks of God as His Redeemer (Job 19:25). Job also comforted himself by saying, “He (God) wounds, but He also binds. He strikes, but He also heals” (Job 5:18).

As the book draws to an end, Job cracks! He begins blaming God! In Job 7:20, he says to God, “Why have you made me your target?” In another chapter, he complains that there is no justice, no matter how hard he cries (Job 19:7-12).

At the end of the book of Job, God answers His child. God answers Job by revealing His glory as the Creator (Job 38-41). God also blessed Job’s latter days more than the beginning (Job 42:12).

Other People in the Bible 

There was a woman called Naomi. Naomi lost her husband and two sons (Ruth 1:1-5). She had to go back to her homeland because there was famine in the town where she lived with her family. When Naomi’s community came to receive her, she told them, “Don’t call me Naomi, call me mara-for the LORD Almighty has dealt bitterly with me. I went away full, and the Lord has brought me back empty. Why call me Naomi? (Ruth 1:20). 

In the end, God gave Naomi a family through her daughter-in-law Ruth. 

Then there is Samson. Samson got betrayed by the woman he loved (Delilah). He was arrested and placed on a stand as his enemies rejoiced over his downfall. Samson also had his eyes gouged out (Judges 16:21). But before he died, Samson prayed to God asking Him for help. In the end, Samson got a greater victory in his death than he ever got in his life. 

And the list goes on, and on, and on. 

So Is it Okay or Not To Blame God?

The issue is not whether it is okay or not to blame God. To me, what I have learnt is that it is not wise to blame God. 

I choose to blame Christian Marketing! The most popular doctrine of the day teaches this “ever-joyful, ever-happy, ever-complete, ever successful, continuously prosperous Christian.” There is so much emphasis on the love of God and all this goodie stuff about Him. Basically, Christian marketing takes one side of God (the Father side) and fails to teach on the other side of God. 

There is a trick to this teaching, and the trick is that it makes us feel SPECIAL! We feel special because we are Christians and God would never let bad things happen to us. 

But the reality is that, whether you are a christian or not, we are not immune to the realities of life (e.g. Tragedy, broken homes, job loss, heart break, lost wealth). 

So for what reason have we believed? 

We believe because of the Resurrection! 

All the people in the Bible, from Genesis to Revelation, one thing that stands out clear is that those who wait on God always end up with a victory. So rather than blame God, it is wiser to remain in God for there is hope in God through Jesus Christ Our Resurrection.

Paul said that there is no temptation that befalls us, that is not common to human beings ( 1 Corinthians 10:13). 

But what is the hope of Christianity! The hope is that the same hand that harms us, is the same hand that will heal us (Job 5:18). And God is a Powerful healer. He heals so well, that you forget your trouble (Genesis 41:51). 

Image by Aaron Burden via Unsplash


Each and every one of us goes through challenges, calamities, and corruption. We all have our stories, and every time we find ourselves faced with this question. “Should I blame God?” But as for me, every failure, corruption, challenge, and calamity has taught me to “wait on God” (Isaiah 30:18).

I see the wisdom of meditating on the goodness He has shown me in my life, and strengthening myself in Him (1 Samuel 30:6). I see the godliness of worshiping Him while in chains (Acts 16:25-34). I see the purpose of clinging onto His love in this fallen world (Psalms 91:14). The bible calls it holding on to hope (Isaiah 40:31).  And trusting in His love for us (Psalms 56:3-4). 

For our hope in God will not be cut-off (Proverbs 23:19). Whether in this life, or the next (Hebrews 11).

If we put the Christian marketing aside, the reality is that faith is hard. But that is why there is a great reward in heaven, for those who hold on to their faith in Christ. 

By the end of the day, the reality is that even Jesus suffered. He was homeless (Luke 9:58), and he died at 33 years. To make it worse! He knew that it was God’s will that He should suffer. Yet, unlike us, Christ understood COMPLETELY the purpose behind the suffering. 

As Augustine said, “God had one child without sin, but never a child without suffering.” 

The reality is, things don’t always go our way. But faith in Christ is a powerful weapon! 

And we have a duty to cultivate this faith. Instead of blaming Him, we choose to say like Job.

“Naked I came to this world! And naked will I leave it.” (Job 1:21).

But this is what Paul says to Timothy. Paul says, “There is great gain in godliness with contentment; for we brought nothing into the world, and we cannot take anything out of this world (2 Timothy 6:6). 

Take up your cross! Walk with Christ Daily! There is no reason to blame Him. Rather, let’s walk with Him trusting  in His love. 

Besides, there is a reason why the Jews call Him-Jehovah Gmolah (meaning: The LORD of Recompense). 

Think about these things, and be blessed. 


Oh GOD! I blame you no more!

Where I made mistakes, I seek forgiveness,

I bear the consequences, and seek your wisdom,

Where life strikes me, I mourn in you,

For amidst all the doctrines, all the teachings,

This one lesson stands true.

God There is Love in You.

And Jesus Christ is the proof of that Love,

So I calm my soul,

And watch my mouth,

My love and hope is Christ

Oh GOD! I blame you no more.